A couple of weeks ago, I wrote about strange Christmas traditions. Among them, the Catalonian tradition of placing a Caganer among their nativity and other Christmas scenes. What's a Caganer? Literally "the defecator" or "the crapper".

The figurines (or giant statues as seen in this mall display) depict Catalonians and famous people from around the world squatting to do their doo. In the past, top crappers have included Queen Elizabeth and Pope Francis. This year, Catalonian Caganer makers updated their offering to include Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump, but neither presidential pooper out-sold the all-time best-seller: Barack Obama.

What's the history of this tradition? Stories vary, but the most reasonable explanation is the figures recall a time when human waste was used as fertilizer to grow more food. Placing "the crapper" in your Christmas display is thought to give a boost the coming year's crops.

So next time you're in the Catalonia region of Spain around the holiday season, look for your favorite celebrities taking a squat among the decorations. You never know who you'll see next!

See you next week,
Bobby

Or you could make or break a habit - for a lifetime. At least, that's what 'they' say. (Whoever 'they' are.) The point is, with focused attention for the first 21 days of the new year, you could start someThing awesome - without having to make a New Year's resolution.

Here are some more practical Things you could do in these first three weeks of the year:

• Learn to play an instrument. That's right, with just 21 days of daily practice you can go from awful to amateur. It might take a bit longer to get to maestro, but take it 21 days at a time.
• Start an exercise routine. Ugh, right? But it doesn't have to be a killer routine that sucks the life and resolve out of you on the first day at the gym. Start small by walking 15-30 minutes every day for 21 days. After that, exercise will be a new habit and you can build from there.
• Learn astronomy (or someThing else). If you study someThing every day for 21 days straight, you'll have a good knowledge base to start with. If you like it, keep going. If not, pick someThing else and give that 21 days.  

I love the holiday season. Not only do I get some time off work, I get to spend time with my huge family. This year is really going to be special - my sister and I cooked up a scheme to get some 'long lost' family members to town this year. It's going to be the best gift of the whole day!

Of course, I also get to play with my new toys. And, as my nieces and nephews get older, they get more complicated Things for Christmas. They always let their Uncle Bobby help put their new toys together, which almost always works out. Either way, with surprise family members coming and some pretty cool Things under the tree, we're looking forward to a special  Christmas day.

But before I leave for the weekend, I want to wish you and yours a warm, safe, and Merry Christmas. And here's hoping you get everyThing - and every person - you wanted for Christmas. And more

See you next week,
Bobby

My sister wandered by my office the other day, which could only mean one Thing: she has zero idea what I want for Christmas. It's not her fault. Every family has that one person who's impossible to buy for. In my family, it's me.

It's not because I'm picky. I like almost everyThing. My problem is that I never have been able to wait for Christmas. And now that I'm a grown up, I don't have to! I can buy whatever I want (within reason) whenever I want to. It's the best part of this whole 'adult' Thing. That and eating ice cream for breakfast.

Here's my best advice for getting a great gift for geeks: think small. If your cousin is a Dr. Who fan, chances are she already has a scale model (or full size) Tardis. But does she have a full set of DW ornaments? Maybe not.

After watching my sister try to circle around the subject for more than a little while, I let her off the hook. These cool tiny laser guns came in last week, but I haven't even had a chance to play with one yet, let alone buy them. So, I'm letting her get them for me. Sort of my gift to her. (But don't tell her I said that!)

See you next week,
Bobby

Christmas is one of my favorite holidays. And not just because of all the cool Things under the tree. Sappy as it sounds, I love our family traditions. We do the usual stuff like stringing popcorn garland for the tree, watching It's A Wonderful Life, hanging stockings and eating an enormous feast with the extended family.

We also have a few non-traditional traditions. On Christmas Eve night we take all the kids out go-carting and then stop for fast food, but not for us, for Santa. My oldest nephew dreamed up the idea. He said Santa probably gets tired of cookies and milk. Wouldn't he like a juicy hamburger and frosty cold Coke instead?

It might seem odd to you, but as non-traditional traditions go, ours aren't so weird. Check out these strange traditions from other parts of the world:

• Catalonians include the Caganer, a small figure of a pooping man, in their nativity scenes. 
• In Ukraine, they don' t decorate trees with fancy lights and tinsel. Instead, they decorate with an artificial spider and webbing. (I like this one - put your old Halloween decorations to work!)
• In the U.S., kids get coal in their stockings when they don't behave. In Austria, a Christmas devil called Krampus is said to beat naughty kids with branches.

Robert Scott was arrested and booked on obscenity charges by police in Kenner, Louisiana after trying to pick up a woman who sat outside her hotel eating lunch. The 78-year-old man approached the young woman, told her she looked like a model, and offered to take her out.

She politely declined, but the elderly gentleman was not deterred. He then offered, among other Things, to become her "sugar daddy". As the man's comments turned more and more explicit, the woman became offended and flatly told him to "get out of her face".

Ever persistent, the man then dropped his pants and underwear "to his feet", exposing his behind to her as she tried to eat.  According to authorities, two other women reported similar encounters with the mooning man near the same hotel. He was taken into custody by the Kenner Police Department at the hotel and his bond was set at $5,000.

The moral of the story? If a woman tells you to get out of her face, don't stick your butt in it. The most you'll get out of it is a trip to jail, a big bail bill and probably a fine. But what you won't get is the girl.

See you next week,
Bobby

Renowned physicist Stephen Hawking said this week that humans might be making a huge mistake by trying to make 'first contact' with alien species. Hawking is part of the "Breakthrough Listen" project. It's goal is to develop super sensitive radio receivers to listen in on alien civilizations. If they're there.

But there's another project called Breakthrough Message. It aims to create a transmission "representative of humanity and planet Earth" to send to an extraterrestrial civilization. They pledge "...not to transmit any message until there has been a global debate at high levels of science and politics on the risks and rewards of contacting advanced civilizations".

Professor Hawking thinks that's a seriously bad idea. He wants to eavesdrop on alien civilizations, but stay out of the conversation. In his mind, it's in our best interest to keep our heads down and our mouths shut. He says he worries that advanced aliens “will be vastly more powerful and may not see us as any more valuable than we see bacteria.”

Ouch.

Some people think it might be dangerous even to listen to an alien message. It's possible it could be an encoded message like a computer virus that, once in our minds, could kill us. Or worse.

But the whole Thing might be a moot point. We've been broadcasting everyThing from I Love Lucy to Star Trek into the cosmos for decades. If someone is out there listening, it's probably too late to shut up now.

See you next week,
Bobby