Happy Limerick Day!

Today we celebrate English artist/illustrator/author/poet/superhero Edward Lear's birthday by creating and sharing ridiculous limericks, a poetic style to which he has been widely credited.

I love a good limerick. Hell, I even love a bad limerick. For those horrifically unaware of this exquisite style of poetry, a limerick is a short, nonsense poem consisting of five lines. The first two lines rhyme with the fifth, and the second and third lines rhyme with each other. Purists suggest following a strict number of syllables per line, but that often proves limiting.^[1] In general, lines three and four are shorter than the others, and the stanza follows a bouncy rhythm called "anapestic meter". What this all boils down to is that they're not fancy-pants sonnets, and you don't have to be Shakespeare to whip one out (though, the bard has actually written a few, so no pressure, right?).

I've included a couple of helpful examples below, so you, too, can appreciate this fine linguistic art. The first was inspired by the day the Things Crew carried out their revenge for when I'd loaded all the office desk fans with glitter on April Fools' Day.^[2] The second illustrates a delightfully popular limerick style^[3], where the content is more... suggestive.

Without further ado..

(Almost) Death By Nachos

There once was a guy named Bobby

Who'd sampled the free nachos in the lobby

He soon realized

He'd need to be hospitalized

For the pranksters had switched the guacamole with wasabi.^[4]

Get To The Choppa

There once was a dude named Rick

Who couldn't wait to show off his new trick

When a victim he'd spy

"Check this out!" he'd cry

And impersonate a helicopter using only his elbow.^[5]

Limericks celebrate the beauty that is juvenile humor, which is an important quality we strive to cultivate at Things, as evidenced by our truckloads of shenanigan-inspiring gags for the maturity challenged, ranging from joke books to prank gift boxes to fake poop.

And should you aspire to write a score of your very own limericks (YES OMG DO IT), but lack the inspiration, you can find many helpful word choices in our Creative Cursing Book.^[6]

See you next week,

Bobby

1. For me, because I can only brain so hard and I have Things to do.
2. Maybe now they'll start reading my blog, because it's not like I didn't warn them.
3. As well as the fact that I haven't matured past the seventh grade.
4. My sinuses are still recovering,
5. Not actually his elbow.
6. Bonus: This book is especially handy at the DMV.